Enraged by China Miéville’s easy acceptance of male pattern baldness, Donald Trump descended from his tower (via helicopter), golf-club in hand (a nine-iron, I believe) and set about the surprised author.
After a moment of understandable confusion, during which Donald Trump landed a blow to his unexpecting foe’s upper left arm, China Miéville rallied, grabbing the lid of a nearby bin to use as a de facto shield. Thus prepared he went on the offensive, driving Donald Trump back towards the waiting helicopter before, hefting the bin lid like a discus China Miéville threw with his not inconsiderable might. With a clatter it struck the bridge of the tycoon’s nose and he fell, unconscious, onto the ground.
As a privately-hired security team lifted Donald Trump back onto his helicopter China Miéville watched them go, bemused as to the sudden and abrupt eruption of inexplicable violence.
Little did he know that his journey had just begun…
WINNER: CHINA MIÉVILLE by DISCUS KNOCKOUT